Sweet Coconut & Vanilla Popcorn Will Cure Your Inner Evil

PROPERCORN Sweet Coconut and Vanilla
Vanilla and Coconut popcorn? Yes!

Today we reach a sad end to our PROPERCORN voyage of popcorn posts which have spread edification and enlightenment amongst you all. Indeed, Sweet Coconut & Vanilla is the final, last, conclusive, and only remaining popcorn bag we’ve not covered from its range. What a shame we had to reach this point so suddenly.

This flavour is one of the newest in PROPERCORN’s range, which is quite the marvel! As you’d expect, it tastes like sweet coconut and with a hint of vanilla. Now we can think of a number of other products which have vanilla to give them a sense of purpose (Assam Tea with Vanilla – the Best Tea Ever), and this is one mighty fine effort we feel we should be shouting about. So we will, right here and right now!

PROPERCORN’S SWEET COCONUT & VANILLA!

Why is it when one types in caps and read over one’s content, it’s as if one is shouting? Here have a look: The cat sat on the mat. Now behold this sentence: THE CAT SAT ON THE MAT! No, it bloody well did not, with you shouting like that the cat bolted in panic, launched itself on your face, and scratched you like a crazed ferret. Do not shout, sir, it will only bring you misery and distress.

In the annals of history, we’re pretty sure vanilla hasn’t been associated with misery and distress. Popcorn, too. The two are typically thought of as safe havens which promote wellbeing and a sense of calm, retrospection, and the out bout of sneezing. Add in some coconut and, my word, you’ve got the most relaxing bag of popcorn ever!

Mind you, there was that time Keith Richards climbed a coconut tree (to impress his girlfriend) and fell out, almost ending his indestructible legacy. Despite this near miss, coconuts are largely completely harmless. They only cause severe injury when one launches one at someone’s head – don’t do this, it would be bloody dangerous.

This lovely bag of popcorn isn’t dangerous. It’s lovely. It’s so lovely, why we’ve used lovely four times to describe its loveliness. Indeed, the only way this couldn’t be lovely is if one was being chased by a great white shark and one didn’t have time to open the packet as one was too busy fleeing. If this seems like an unlikely scenario, you’re right. There aren’t any shops in the ocean to go and buy this stuff, for a start.

Adieu, PROPERCORN!

We’re going to be eating PROPERCORN products like there’s no tomorrow from tomorrow onwards, as we have been doing for a number of years now. Why not? We will, however, probably not be writing about it again… at least not for another 12 months, at which point we’ll probably run this popcorn fest again as you’ll have forgotten about this one. Indeed.

We encourage you all to turn to this sort of high-quality popcorn, however. The truth it, those microwavable baggy ones are full of all sorts of horrendous chemicals which will make your lungs bleed and your earlobes melt. You don’t want that, do you? Good! So either buy a bag of organic popcorn kernels, or turn to glorious PROPERCORN!

2 comments

Dispense with some gibberish!

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