During our recent bout of scurvy-induced influenza, the Professional Moron team realised sleep was not an option. To fill the endless void of the night, we stuck on some relaxing rain type noises. Worth a shot, right? Better than just lying there listening to ourselves hacking away every 10 seconds like people with really nasty coughs.

Reign It In

What is it about rain that’s so soothing? When you’re indoors, it’s essentially a middle finger to the environment. You’re safe inside, and mother nature is going mental to no effect. Bwa. Bwahahaha! The other thing is maybe it’s just fun listening to those raindrops slaughtering themselves to death. Either way, it’s relaxing.

So yes, we had the above on a 10 hour loop through the night! Not wishing to be repetitive, we then tried the below one out for Sunday. This one is replete with the sounds of the ocean and whatnot (with rain overlaid). Because the sea is relaxing. Unless you’re stranded out there. Then it’s hellish.

So, after two nights we got experimental and ran with a slightly more high-concept version below. Now, this one didn’t have the same desired effect. Rain sounds? Check. Ocean? No. Jeff Goldblum? Hell yeah! So a few boxes were ticked, but the incredibly loud and annoying dinosaur and sense of terror kind of didn’t do it for us.

Unimpressed with Steven Spielberg’s attempts at relaxation, we turned our attention to a few other films. Hollywood knows a thing or two about this, right? So we decided to look more into relaxing ocean waves. Wel… the results was a bit depressing more than anything, really. Hmmmm…

But anyway, we’re waffling. And this was supposed to be a short post so we can rest up. So we’ll end on a little snippet from lovely Studio Ghibli romp Ponyo. Try as we might, we couldn’t find the full length clip. But even 15 seconds of this is better than any bloody Pixar movie, in our jaded opinion. Sleep well, you idiotic readers.