Today we’re pitching mother nature against mothers, fathers, daughters, sons, and nephews (possibly nieces, too) in a great big sound off. Which species is best at making noises? Humans, or every other animal on Earth? Let’s find out.

Human Noises

Okay, so as our readers are a bit dumb we’ve included the above video for kids. Watch that and you’ll appreciate what your average humaan does to make their day go (noisily) by.

Common examples of human noises include:

• Talking: “Hello!”, “Hi, how are you?”, and “Give me your wallet or I’ll knife you!” These are common phrases most humans can expect to hear in their lifetime.
• Moving: Scratching, walking, running, punching someone in the face etc.
• Eating: Talking with your mouth full etc.
• Bodily functions: Sneezing, coughing, various other issues relating to the bladder and bowels.
• Bone crunching injuries: Not necessarily a sound a human wants to make, but if you get your leg jammed in a lift and the lift sets off upstairs then expect something along the lines of, *CCrrruuuNNNCHhhh*. That’s typically followed by manic screaming and persistent complaints about above average pain.

There are other noises we make, but primarily the human opens his or her mouth and spewing forth are a variety of different sounds. An example is below.

That is “the burp”. It is a gaseous emission humans make after consuming one too many litres of fizzy drinks.

As you can tell, it’s an undesriable noise. Few consider it attractive. But let us focus on the burp for a bit longer. It’s associated with comedy, so let’s have a listen to Barney Gumble from The Simpsons.

Now, whilst it may appear like we’re indulging in mockery (which, indeed, we are) let us not forget that humans can be rather talented with their noises, too.

Take voice actors, for instance. We’ve wanted to cover Mr. Hank Azaria for a while now, as we like the humility of the guy.

Although he’s starred in Friends and is a regular on The Simpsons, he’s the type of bloke you could walk by on the street and not know who (or, indeed, whom) he is.

So, full credit to Azaria there. Great voice acting. Great talent. A pity Godzilla (1998) ended up so rubbish, though.

Animal Noises

Animals are fairly similar to humans. Sort of. Mouths are important for communicating noise, clearly, but the animal has a disparate set of sounds going on.

The humble goat often tries to sound like a human. But, on the whole, animals have a wide ranging bunch of noises that are usually prettier than the human burp.

Take this lyrebird, which has some excellent noises amongst its repertoire. Along with the lovely chirping and tweeting, it can also do impressions of chainsaws. Hell yeah!

Some other animals aren’t so gifted with their noises, though. Some are downright primitive, really. Check out this psychotic bastard!

Oh that stupid cute little bastard. Huh. I guess sometimes you just don’t need to make a sound to stand out, eh?