The Delusional Donkey

The star of BBC's next big hit sitcom!
The star of BBC’s next big hit sitcom!

Today at Professional Moron we’ve been toying with the concept of a Comedy/Drama character for a series intended for BBC1. Prime Time Viewing, of course! The series would revolve around a delusional donkey (hence the name of the show) and his wacky antics with the people/animals he meets. The appeal of for The Delusional Donkey would be the donkey (Dave) who is so delusional he often gets himself into the aforementioned wacky situations. For instance; in one episode where he’s eating loads of grass in a field, he witnesses the farmer firing his shotgun wildly into the air (the farmer’s convinced he’s being monitored by aliens and the government – he’s also a bit mentally unhinged). Donkey Dave doesn’t think this is unusual and remarks to his friend, Craig the Cow, “I am Albert Einstein.” World weary Craig can only shake his head in dismay at the continued delusions of Dave. Much of the series would revolve around Dave’s bizarre statements, although we would introduce a love story with Doreen the Donkey to keep the Old Age Pensioners happy (OAPs love a good love story), as well as adding in drama elements (Dave and Craig have an argument about celery), and poignant asides (“Back in my day, farming were reet proper good!”).

Obviously we’d need to train a donkey for this role and that would be expensive, as well as time consuming. All in all we’re looking at a required budget of around £150 million, and we’d want some big name actors like Keith Chegwin and Burt Bacharach to boost initial ratings. There’s no reason why The Delusional Donkey wouldn’t be a global smash hit, though, so we trust Professional Moron’s readers support Mr. Wapojif’s latest deranged idea. Hurrah!

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