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Professional Moron

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Author: Mr. Wapojif

I'm the esteemed editor of the equally esteemed Professional Moron. My education is non-existent, my IQ is violently below average, and I smell. I do, however, occasionally write interesting things.
Legal terms improved by using poo in the title
24 hours ago July 24, 2017July 22, 2017Mr. Wapojif

20 Legal Terms Improved By Adding “Poo” Into Them

Tago Mago - Can
2 days ago July 23, 2017July 11, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Tago Mago: Can’s Explosive, Thunderous, Pulsating Masterpiece

Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
3 days ago July 22, 2017July 22, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Book of da Week: Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad

How to go bald gracefully
4 days ago July 21, 2017July 22, 2017Mr. Wapojif

How to Go Bald Gracefully (a manly man’s guide)

Grease on Toast
5 days ago July 20, 2017July 20, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Grease on Toast (better than cheese on toast)

Reni - Drummer extraordinaire, genius, and singer
6 days ago July 19, 2017July 15, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Reni: Drumming Genius, Singing, & Ubiquitous Bucket Hats

Trainspitting
7 days ago July 18, 2017July 18, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Great Films That Never Were: Trainspitting (trains, spit, no drugs)

Mouthmosh - It does a better job than mouthwash
1 week ago July 17, 2017July 11, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Invention: MouthMosh (for rocking out with the benefit of fresh breath)

Earthworm Jim 2
1 week ago July 16, 2017July 15, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Earthworm Jim 2: It’s The Super Surreal, Super Sequel!

The Roads to Freedom trilogy - Jean-Paul Sartre
1 week ago July 15, 2017July 15, 2017Mr. Wapojif

The Roads to Freedom Trilogy: Sartre’s Classic Novels in Review

Steppenwolf by Hermann Hesse
1 week ago July 15, 2017July 15, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Book of da Week: Steppenwolf by Hermann Hesse

Washing down liquid
2 weeks ago July 14, 2017July 8, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: Washing Down Liquid to Hit Supermarket Shelves and Facilitate Pessimists

Lemon Migraine Pie
2 weeks ago July 13, 2017July 8, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Lemon Migraine Pie (skip work in style!)

Whiplash - Not quite my tempo
2 weeks ago July 12, 2017July 13, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Whiplash: “Not quite my tempo” Quote Off Extravaganza!

Bleach balls - everyone is happy with bleach involved
2 weeks ago July 11, 2017July 6, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: Bleach Ball – For Great Times by the Sea!

The best chat up lines for men
July 10, 2017July 6, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Agony Aunt: “HELP! I need more chat up lines to use on hot birds!”

Earthworm Jim - SNES and Mega Drive
July 9, 2017July 8, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Earthworm Jim: Celebrating the 16 Bit, Ultra-Surreal Classic

God Is Not Great - Christopher Hitchens
July 8, 2017July 13, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Book of da Week: God Is Not Great by Christopher Hitchens

How to Name Your Baby Guide
July 7, 2017July 1, 2017Mr. Wapojif

How to Name Your Baby (with help from Professional Moron!)

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth
July 6, 2017July 6, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Great Sayings Revisited: Don’t look a git horse in the mouth

Planet of the Apes - Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape!
July 5, 2017July 5, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Planet of the Apes: “Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!” Quote Off Extravaganza!

The Humbrella
July 4, 2017July 4, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Invention: The Humblebrella (keeping you dry and humble)

Banofeet pie
July 3, 2017July 3, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Banofeet Pie (making feet acceptable again)

GoNNER on the Nintendo Switch
July 2, 2017June 30, 2017Mr. Wapojif

GoNNER: Weirdo Indie Gem Makes its Nintendo Switch Debut

SNES Mini
July 2, 2017July 1, 2017Mr. Wapojif

SNES Mini Classic: Pre-Orders, Anger, Filth, Fury, & Awesome

A Very Easy Death - Simone de Beauvoir
July 1, 2017July 1, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Book of the Week: A Very Easy Death by Simone de Beauvoir

Bobble hats banned in the UK
June 30, 2017June 29, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: Bobble Hats Outlawed For Summer – Bobble Hat Enthusiasts Outraged

Oscar Winning Films Ruined by Cement
June 29, 2017June 30, 2017Mr. Wapojif

20 Oscar Winning Films Ruined By Adding “Cement” to the Title

Jo Jones - Drumming God
June 28, 2017June 28, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Jo Jones: Celebrating a Drumming God with a Mischievous Grin

Slipper Kippers
June 27, 2017June 27, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: Slipper Kippers (for wearing and eating!)

Why can't I use mankind in conversation
June 26, 2017June 25, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Agony Aunt: “HELP! Why can’t I say ‘mankind’ no more?!”

Future Days - Can
June 25, 2017June 25, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Future Days: Can’s Ambient Indie Masterpiece

June 24, 2017June 24, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Ori and the Blind Forest: Definitive Edition (2016)

The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald
June 24, 2017June 17, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Book of da Week: The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

June 23, 2017June 18, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Marshland Marshmallows & Sardine Ice Cream

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Steve the #hamster in action yesterday morning. An intrepid hero right there. #Turmeric is golden! Absolutely. Delicious #tea right here. Brrrmmmn brrrmmm!!! Brrrmmmm, brrrmmmmmm, brrrrrrrmmmm! #Toys Let's not forget the power of #Queen or #FreddieMercury. Aiiiiie. Wonderful way to cheer me up on a dark day. Perfectly timed, thank you @retrogamermag! ♥️ #SuperMarioKart #SNES #RetroGaming Telling Steve off for tipping one of his wheels over. #Hamster tantrums.

Our Most Excellent Posts

The Best Song Titles That Haven’t Been Used Yet
Titanic: “I’m flying... Jack!” Quote Off Extravaganza!
20 Legal Terms Improved By Adding "Poo" Into Them
10 Vegetables Which Sound Like Your Insulting Someone
Pie Debate: Are Pies Unhealthy?
As Good As It Gets: “You make me want to be a better man” Super Quote Off Extravaganza!
Why Does Jeff Goldblum Say “Must go faster” In Jurassic Park & Independence Day?
Exclusive Recipe: Onion Ice Cream!
Tago Mago: Can's Explosive, Thunderous, Pulsating Masterpiece
Mozart and Scatological Humour: Diagnosing a Genius

Arbitrary Image Alert!

Behold... Jupiter!

Autumn?!

ZOMG! IT'S AUTUMN!September 22nd, 2017
59 days to go.

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