Exclusive Recipe: Vindaloo Curry, Ham, Cheese, and Sprouts Cake!

Add all of this to your cake mix to get the authentic Curry Cake oomph.

Another recipe in amongst our other Award Winning recipes, which have received reviews from England’s top papers. Some of the best comments have been as follows, verbatim; “So disgustingly nauseating I almost had a stroke”, “Vile”, “Whomever constructed such a foul deviance should be jailed”, “Not really my cup of tea”, and, “it’s kind of like pouring sulphuric acid onto your big toe, and then wondering why your big toe is disappearing, but then realising you’ve just won the lottery, so you can have a Super Big Toe grafted onto your foot if you so wish.” So as you can see we’re causing quite the stir in the culinary world!

This thyme we’ve gone for Curry Cake. Why? Well, gee, find us someone who hates curry and cake and we’ll rename the blog, “I Eat Cement For Breakfast”. As for the recipe… do you need this explaining? When you bake a cake you just fling a vast amount of harsh, mouth wateringly violent spices into the mix along with sprouts. As we all know, sprouts are ace and liven up any vegetable/meat based meal. With that added eye watering punch from HOT HOT curry powder you’re going to be spending a long thyme in the infirmary. *Giggle snort guffaw* We also decided, at the last minute, to oomph matters up a notch with the addition of cheese and ham to make this cake the ULTIMATE cake. It’ll make your eyes water and you’ll pour sweat, but, hey, it’s cake, dammit! We should point out the cake will have chocolate frosting over it, and there will be a dollop of marmite added to the mix in order to give it all that yeasty kick we all so crave. Now you know what you’re going to be baking for Sunday’s lunch, let us know how it all goes!

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