It’s time for a merry post about, SHOCK, video games! You total dorkish, dweebish, geekish, nerd you, Mr. Wapojif! Yes, it’s true, but I grew up playing video games and I do enjoy them so. There’s absolutely no reason why everyone out there shouldn’t enjoy these things, so one has compiled a list of games that will make you drool and think happy, slappy thoughts. Indeed.
Now here at Professional Moron we’re into our mindless escapism, and video games can supply that in gusto. The gaming world, sadly, is populated by idiots who think a “mature” and fun gaming experience is one where they can massacre absolutely everyone in sight – Grand Theft Auto and its ilk. Whilst these games are good, we’re more into our artistic, creative, and downright fun journeys into digital land, so that’s why we grew up playing, and still love, Nintendo and its horde of happy, slappy characters. Much like Ren and Stimpy we rejoice – Happy Happy Joy Joy!
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1. Mario Galaxy
One of Nintendo’s finest games, this epic sees you blasting around space with all the awesomeness of the Wii remote control at your disposal. It’s relentlessly inventive, stunning to look at, and the orchestral score makes the whole experience even more wonderbar. We can highly recommend this to everyone! It’s one of the, if not THE, best games from the last generation of consoles.
2. Rayman Origins
About as close to perfection as games come, this ridiculously joyous romp with Rayman and his mates features truly lovely graphics, a wonderful soundtrack, and more charisma and warmth than a bucket of strawberries. And, boy, do we love strawberries! But we’d give up all the strawberries in the world just to have a copy of this most wonderful of games, and that’s some statement. It’s a 2D platformer with innovation, downright “freshness”, and giddy sense of humour and fun. Worth buying a Wii just to play, but you can also get it on the PS3 and Nintendo 3DS.
3. World of Goo
Other than Tetris there really aren’t many puzzle games that really stand out. World of Goo is one of them. You have to construct the lively little Goo balls in berserkly inventive fashion, directing them to a sort of pipe thing which promptly catapults you to the next fiendishly difficult level. You’ll need to be clever bunny to make it through this one; the most agile, free thinking brains will be able to make the best progress. Are you dumb and unimaginative? Best steer clear of this one. Oh and, once again, the music’s quite wonderfully charming.
4. Lost Winds
A truly glovely (yes, glovely, that’s not a typo) 2D action romp where you use your Wii remote to create gusts of wind to blast your diminutive protagonist, Toku, around the screen. ONCE MORE this game has truly glovely, Japanese tinged music and a laidback nature. Really good fun and a very relaxing play to boot, with puzzles fiendish enough to be most satisfying when completed.
5. Okami
Ahhh, Okami (pronounced Oak-ami, dumbo). A truly epic game where one guides the resurrected form of the Sun god who has taken over the body of a white wolf. Indeed. You are joined by a talking bug who guides you through the game; you use traditional Japanese art to engage with your enemies; slashes, gusts of wind, lightening bolts, bombs and numerous others are implemented to fend off the horrifying monsters! A really wicked, super groovy game to play.
