Professional Moron

Professional Moron

Daily Doses of Surreal Humour & Culture

Menu Skip to content
  • Silliness
    • Insane Inventions
    • Silly Stuff
    • Pretentious Hour
    • Hamsters
    • How to…
    • In Praise Of…
    • In Contempt Of…
  • Food
    • Genius New Recipes
    • Food Disasters
    • Classy Observations
    • Oodles of Noodles
    • Tea Week!
  • Films & TV
    • Quote Off Extravaganzas!
    • TV Shows That Never Were
    • The Very Best Of…
    • Film Reviews And Stuffs
  • Groovy Books
    • Serious Books
    • Not So Serious Books
    • Travel Writing
  • Video Games
    • Retro Gaming
    • Indie Games
    • Modern Games
  • Features
    • Agony Aunt
    • Special Features
    • Exclusive Newsletters From Famous Folks!
    • Learn About History!
    • Get With The Times (News)
  • Posthoumous
  • About

Tag: Food

Fromaige Fred
3 days ago August 21, 2017August 16, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: Fromage Frais to be Renamed Fromage Fred

Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Knightmares
7 days ago August 17, 2017August 18, 2017Mr. Wapojif

TV Shows That Never Were: Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Knightmares

Sauceages are better than sausages
2 weeks ago August 11, 2017August 10, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Sauceages (like sausages, but saucier)

The Tooth Pickaxe
2 weeks ago August 10, 2017August 10, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Tooth Pickaxe (Hygienic & Dangerous!)

Baguettes food and a plastic bin bag
August 8, 2017August 2, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: BAGuettes (baguettes made out of plastic bags)

Toaster and kettle all-in-one
July 31, 2017July 27, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Tettle (a toaster and kettle all-in-one!)

Key lime pie - now with added keys!
July 28, 2017July 27, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Key Lime Pie – Now With Extra Keys!

Jack of all trades (and master of nuns)
July 25, 2017July 25, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Great Sayings Revisited: Jack of all trays (and master of nuns)

Grease on Toast
July 20, 2017July 20, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Grease on Toast (better than cheese on toast)

Lemon Migraine Pie
July 13, 2017July 8, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Lemon Migraine Pie (skip work in style!)

Banofeet pie
July 3, 2017July 3, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Banofeet Pie (making feet acceptable again)

Slipper Kippers
June 27, 2017June 27, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: Slipper Kippers (for wearing and eating!)

June 23, 2017June 18, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Marshland Marshmallows & Sardine Ice Cream

Tzatziki to be renamed
June 16, 2017June 16, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: Controversy as Tzatziki Renamed “Cucumber Dip”

A ladle and a ladder
June 15, 2017June 15, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Laddler (a ladle and ladder all-in-one)

The Spice Girls Pizza
June 14, 2017June 14, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Pizza-Zigazig Ah (Spice Girls themed pizza)

Classic songs ruined by fish
June 7, 2017June 7, 2017Mr. Wapojif

20 Classic Songs Ruined By Using Fish Names in the Titles

Pain et Agony au Chocolat
June 6, 2017June 6, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Pain et Agony au Chocolat (delicious!)

Potatoes
May 31, 2017May 31, 2017Mr. Wapojif

20 Classic Films Ruined By Using “Potato” in the Title

Pommes de Tear clothes recipe
May 25, 2017May 25, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Pommes de Tear (make your torn clothes edible)

Government plans mint plans
May 19, 2017May 19, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: UK Government Plans Major Mint-Based Reforms

Candy Floss Floss
May 17, 2017May 14, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Candy Floss Floss (eat whilst flossing!)

Sardine Soufflé
May 12, 2017May 6, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Sardine & Chocolate Soufflé!

Potato Milk
May 4, 2017April 30, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Potato Milk (like almond milk, but better)

Satsuma Sandwiches
April 27, 2017April 27, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Satsuma, Salt, & Mayonnaise Sandwiches

Don't beat about the mush
April 26, 2017April 26, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Great Sayings Revisited: Don’t beat about the mush

Spoon Fireworks
April 25, 2017April 25, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: Volatile Spoon Fireworks Eating Implement!

April 24, 2017April 24, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: Sparkling Water “Too Sparkling” & Dumbed Down

How to lose one stone in one week
April 20, 2017April 20, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Agony Aunt: “HELP! I need to lose one stone in one week!”

Noodles and Poodles Smoothie
April 19, 2017April 19, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Noodles and Poodle Hair Smoothie

sCones - Cones and Scones Invention
April 18, 2017April 18, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: sCones (a scone and cone hybrid for drivers)

Haddock and Coca Cola Soup
April 3, 2017April 3, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Haddock & Coca Cola Soup!

Crisps Soup Recipe
March 30, 2017March 27, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Crisps Soup!

The Tea Pit
March 28, 2017March 28, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Tea Pit (holds more tea than a tea pot)

Chicken, Mushroom, and Lice Soup
March 23, 2017March 24, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Chicken, Mushroom, & Lice Soup!

Posts navigation

1 2 … 13 →

Join 795 other followers

We’re Sociable, Dammit!

  • View ProfessionalMoron’s profile on Facebook
  • View CreativeMoron’s profile on Twitter
  • View Professional_Moron’s profile on Instagram
  • View 113047790457755711149’s profile on Google+

Cripes… it’s Twitter!

My Tweets

Six Degrees of Instagram

Steve the #hamster in action yesterday morning. An intrepid hero right there. #Turmeric is golden! Absolutely. Delicious #tea right here. Brrrmmmn brrrmmm!!! Brrrmmmm, brrrmmmmmm, brrrrrrrmmmm! #Toys Let's not forget the power of #Queen or #FreddieMercury. Aiiiiie. Wonderful way to cheer me up on a dark day. Perfectly timed, thank you @retrogamermag! ♥️ #SuperMarioKart #SNES #RetroGaming Telling Steve off for tipping one of his wheels over. #Hamster tantrums.

Our Most Excellent Posts

Goldeneye 007: 20th Anniversary for the Legendary N64 Classic
The Best Song Titles That Haven’t Been Used Yet
Titanic: “I’m flying... Jack!” Quote Off Extravaganza!
Star Wars: "Why you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herder!" Quote Off Extravaganza!
Pie Debate: Are Pies Unhealthy?
In Praise of the Jailer from Monty Python's Life of Brian
10 Vegetables Which Sound Like Your Insulting Someone
Aliens: “Get away from her, you bitch!” Quote Off Extravaganza!
Breaking News: Fromage Frais to be Renamed Fromage Fred
10 Fish Which Sound Like You’re Insulting Someone

Arbitrary Image Alert!

Behold... Jupiter!

Autumn?!

ZOMG! IT'S AUTUMN!September 22nd, 2017
29 days to go.

Insert Search Query Here

Copyright & All That

© Professional Moron, 2017. Unauthorised use and/or duplication of our content without permission is prohibited. Excerpts and links can be used, but full credit to us is required. Or else!
Blog at WordPress.com.
Cancel