Professional Moron

Professional Moron

Daily Doses of Surreal Humour & Culture

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Tag: Work

Punch of a fist
3 days ago January 21, 2019January 23, 2019Mr. Wapojif

How to Punch Someone in the Face

Party drinks
December 27, 2018December 27, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Agony Aunt: “HELP! Our office Christmas bash was a disaster!”

Blah
December 10, 2018December 10, 2018Mr. Wapojif

How to Make Small Talk

Commuting man on a train with no hair
November 30, 2018November 30, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: British Train Fares Go UP and Poor People Go MENTAL!

Question
November 29, 2018November 29, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Q&A With Your Learned Subject… Professional Moron!

Man with a mop
November 8, 2018November 10, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Invention: Moppy the Sentient Mop (for excellent mop bot mopping)

Business inspection
October 26, 2018October 26, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Santa Column: Government Inspection & Introducing Nude Working Days!

Post-it notes
October 22, 2018October 21, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: Post-It Boats (sticky, but handy, boats)

Christmas cheer
September 28, 2018September 28, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Santa Column: Singles, Shingles, Gout, & Yuletide Prep

Christmas 2019 with a girl watching Santa in the snow
September 21, 2018September 21, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Santa Claus Column 2018: Morose Grumblings As Santa Returns For XMas!

Jalapeños
September 17, 2018September 15, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: Jalapeños Renamed Jalapenos Threatening Severe ~ Job Losses

Emotions
September 10, 2018December 31, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Emotional Intelligence Test: Find Out How Smart You Is (and are)

Commuting train
September 4, 2018September 4, 2018Mr. Wapojif

10 Proven & Viable Excuses For Missing a Day At Work

Burning
August 16, 2018August 15, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: Burnalism (journalism, but with more flames)

Business
August 14, 2018August 14, 2018Mr. Wapojif

FAQs: What’s business, how do I do it, and when will I be a billionaire?

Job interview questions
July 10, 2018July 9, 2018Mr. Wapojif

FAQs: What Should You Do In a Job Interview?

Job spec for hiring
July 9, 2018July 7, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Job Spec: Join Our Apprenticeship Programme!

Socket
June 8, 2018June 8, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The SOCKet (a socket made out of socks)

Days
June 5, 2018June 5, 2018Mr. Wapojif

7 Days Renamed for the Better

Duck
May 29, 2018May 29, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Great Sayings Revisited: Beginner’s duck

May 28, 2018June 13, 2018Mr. Wapojif

How to Nail a Job Interview

John Wayne acting
May 25, 2018May 20, 2018Mr. Wapojif

In Praise of Dialect Coaches (and other experts)

Rowing boat on water
May 18, 2018May 13, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Rowbot (a robot for rowing you to work)

Letter writing
April 24, 2018April 24, 2018Mr. Wapojif

How to Write a Threatening Letter

Cat photographer
March 13, 2018March 12, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: Photograpurrs (cat photographers)

If the tables are turned, or to turn the tables
December 29, 2017June 23, 2018Mr. Wapojif

Great Sayings Revisited: If the tables were burned…

Library
December 14, 2017December 14, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Great TV Shows That Never Were: Conan the Librarian

Christmas and Santa Claus
December 4, 2017December 3, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Santa Column: Shaking Up The Xmas Script!

A bull
November 29, 2017November 29, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Alarm Bull (better than an alarm bell)

Santa Claus Christmas push
November 21, 2017November 21, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Santa Column: Revving Up For Christmas!

A day in the life of Santa Claus
October 5, 2017September 28, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Santa Claus Column: A Day in the Life of Santa

September 30, 2017September 30, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Charles Bukowski: Post Office (Moonshake Books)

Father Christmas Exclusive Column
September 19, 2017September 19, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Santa Column: Gruesome Accident Report Form Details

August 18, 2017August 13, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Invention: The Shower Hair Dryer (shower & hair dryer all-in-one!)

Lemon Migraine Pie
July 13, 2017July 8, 2017Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Lemon Migraine Pie (skip work in style!)

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Choo choo! #snow #tram #Metrolink #city
Look at all that #dandruff. Or #snow. Probably one of those two. #snowing
#SNOW! In the England! Amazing scenes of amazement in #Manchester. Warning: This video contains British accents. #snowing ⛄️ ❄️
Misty Mountain Hop? #Manchester #city #cityscape #mist #misty #fog 🌫
More moody artsy stuff from me, right after my mission to buy some houmous (took 20 minutes to locate a pot). This picture represents the post-purchase angsty release. #Manchester #HiltonHotel #Deansgate #City #CityLights #CityScape 🏙
#Rashomon by #RyunsukeAkutagawa. Great #book cover and fabulous short stories. Note the #StudioGhibli-esque design. #books #art #Japan 📚 🇯🇵

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Titanic: “I’m flying... Jack!” Quote Off Extravaganza!
Why Does Jeff Goldblum Say “Must go faster” In Jurassic Park & Independence Day?
In Praise of the Opening Music From Mr. Bean
As Good As It Gets: “You make me want to be a better man” Super Quote Off Extravaganza!
How to Punch Someone in the Face
10 Vegetables Which Sound Like Your Insulting Someone

Arbitrary Image Alert!

Behold... Jupiter!

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