Glorious Examples of Why Cabbage Won’t Be The Death of Us All!

Meat and cabbage - see how versatile this thing already is? Hurrah!
Meat and cabbage – see how versatile this thing already is? Hurrah!

Cabbage can be a cruel, harsh, misanthropic mistress, but we’re not overly concerned about any of these accusations. Why? For a start, we don’t know, but, secondly, cabbage is a tasty beverage many of us have enjoyed over the years. It also doubles up as a food stuff which forms the basis for popular meals such as: burgers, cornflakes, rhubarb pudding, athlete’s foot, tennis elbow, Bovril, omelettes, and certain types of sausages. It’s a versatile fruit indeed, and we will be honouring it this Christmas by including it with our Christmas Roast Dinner. Savoy cabbage, of course, as it’s arguably the best type of cabbage. Hell, it IS the best cabbage, and we’re not being racist by stating this fact. And it is a fact.

So, in honour of cabbage, we include examples in today’s post of why it won’t be the death of humanity. There are plenty of other things which won’t kill us all (for instance: socks, pencils, fire blankets, Burt Bacharach, Elvis, Vitamin C, and bins) but we’d be here all day listing them. And we don’t got all day, ya hear? So, without further ado, we direction you towards the glorious pictures. Is this an easy, cop out post so we don’t have to write much more? Correct, but we do have to work, you know. Read on, Macduff!

This is how you cook it. Bung it in a pan and put on full blast (heat). Sit back and relax as the cabbage fries.

There is also red cabbage. This is cabbage which has gone to the Dark Side and embraced Communism.

Here’s another Communist.

This is “Sorbet of Cabbage”, which we presume is some sort of sordid joke invented by Communists.

Cabbage is in these charcoal stricken messes, we assure you.

Cabbage dumplings.

This is purple cabbage, so the process of Communist alienation hasn’t quite taken full sway over this particular individual. May Capitalist Regimes save its soul.

We postulated the theory of Food Splats last December, and we think this thing lives up to the Food Splat standards.

This is how the assimilation of Communist principles first strikes a cabbage. The individual is hijacked by the Reds and forced to eat salami type ham.

A soupy/broth like cabbage extravaganza.

Gerkins are a cabbage’s best friend. Note the drink is afflicted by Communism.

Food Splat and bread.

Yeah, we get the feeling this went a bit wrong. It looks drier than a Fascist in the middle of summer.

Good use of cabbage, here!

“Er, where’s the cabbage?” One of the tubs is a coleslaw tub, we’re reliably informed.

Splendiferous.

A cabbage dumpling type thing.

“Bacon and Cabbage”.

Alien sausages and cabbage.

A HUGE chunk of cabbage with this one.

And finally, Communism infects this dish like the plague!

Have some gibberish to dispense with?

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