Pretentious Hour: The Mona Lisa 2

The Mona Lisa: Part II by Mr. Wapojif (TM 01/02/2013)
The Mona Lisa: Part II by Mr. Wapojif (TM 01/02/2013)

We know we don’t really have any discerning or notable artistic talent in the Professional Moron office, but this isn’t going to stop us from attempting to make a Work Of Art (WOA for short). This particular WOA is the much belated sequel to the first outing by Leonardo DiCaprio (do your homework, he is an artist, just watch Titanic to see), circa 1503. Now, 500 years later, we produce The Mona Lisa: Part II! We’re well aware recreating classics can be an utterly disastrous endeavour (just look at the 1998 shot-for-shot remake of Hitchcock’s Psycho) but, you know, nothing has ever stood in our way before (apart from really tall, unmoveable things such as Mount Everest) and we’re not going to start now with some pithy drawing of a smug old hag!

Our effort can be seen on the above (or wherever it ends up on this post) picture. As you can see it looks more like a chuffed John Lennon than the Mona Lisa, but it’s the effort what does matter, innit geez. Nonetheless we would like to discuss the merits of the picture; the enigmatic smile is in place, the hair looks great, the Mona Lisa 2 is also wearing John Lennon’s trademark glasses! Who would have thunk that? To find out more read on, you rabid fiend, you!

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If you’re wondering if we based this contemporary Mona Lisa on anyone (no, it isn’t based on John Lennon) then you’ll be delighted to know this person is very real and goes by the name of Burt Bacharach. Here’s the proof as Mrs. Bacharach meets with Leo DiCaprio (the painter of the original Mona Lisa) at the grand opening of The Mona Lisa: Part II. It is unclear whether they have begun dating or not, although it us unlikely as Mr. DiCaprio is several hundred years older than she, as displayed vividly in the picture below. Clearly the ravages of time have not been kind on DiCaprio. The poor, misguided fool.

Enjoying the limelight.
Enjoying the limelight.

Anyway, join us in rejoicing at the brilliance of our drawing. We feel proud and honoured to be blessed with such a genius level of artistic ability; from now on you may only address us as a “Sage”, and it is no longer our “art”, it is our Medium. Respect is due.

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