We’re literary buffs here at Professional Moron, but this doesn’t mean we’re stuffy sorts who can’t laugh at the brilliance of classic novels reduced to stupidity.
As a consequence, we decided to think of some great novels, and reduce them to silliness by inserting “cheese” somewhere in the title.
Books and Cheese: The Very Worst Famous Novels With a Dairy Twist
The result makes for intriguing reading. Imagine if one of these authors had hit their head, or something, and then decided their great work of literature just couldn’t be brilliant… without the insertion of “cheese” into the name of the book.
It would have changed the course of history. For instance, imagine if Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels had called their polemical text The Cheese Manifesto.
Communism would have been a little bit different, huh? There would have been a lot more cheese about the place, that’s for damn sure as mustard. Anyway, you get the idea. Unless you’re a bit stupid. If you are, don’t fear, you’ll pick it up as you go along.
So, without further a moo, here are great works of literature… ruined by Professional Moron. Are we philistines? Yes, I think we probably are. Huzzah!
Cheese and Punishment
The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Cheese
In Cold Cheese
The Age of Cheese
The Ballad of the Sad Cheese
The Man in the Cheese Castle / Do Androids Dream of Electric Cheese?
Cheese and the Penguin
The Worst Cheese in the World
The Call of the Cheese
The Old Man and the Cheese / For Whom The Cheese Tolls
Cheese and Prejudice
The Lord of the Cheeses
To Kill a Mockingcheese
Cheese of the D’Urbervilles
The Complete Cheese of Shakespeare
War and Cheese
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Cheese
Grapes of Cheese / Of Mice and Cheese
The Cheese in the Willows
The Lion, The Witch, and The Cheese
Captain Corelli’s Cheese
One Hundred Years of Cheese / Cheese in the Time of Cholera
Far From the Madding Cheese
Brave New Cheese
The Curious Incident of the Cheese In The Night Time
The Cheese of Monte Cristo
The Remains of the Cheese
Charlie and the Cheese Factory
My Family and Other Cheeses
Down and Cheese in Paris and London / Animal (Cheese) Farm
A Little History of the Cheese
The Curious Cheese of Benjamin Button / The Great Cheeseby
A Portrait of the Cheese as a Young Man
Heart Of Cheeseness
One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Cheese
Alice’s Adventures In Cheese
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Cheese
The Cheese of Dorian Gray
In Search of Lost Cheese
Journey to the End of the Cheese
The Cheese of Miss Jean Brodie
Tinker Tailor Soldier Cheese
All cheesed out? Good! Head to our About section to lodge a complaint about this lunacy!