Music speaks to people in the way halfwits push at doorways that need pulling forward. So today, we’re celebrating that, music, singles, and The Doors.
Also, we’d like to remind everyone that we’re not mocking vacuity. We revel in it. So, please buy these hit singles and make them successful.
Call Me, Halfwit
Blondie’s accusatory single about why some men wouldn’t call her. Well, you know, not everyone likes blondes!
Another Halfwit in the Wall
Well, Pink Floyd, that’s great and everything. But… well, no. That’s it. Carry on.
Robin Thicke’s terrible song here. We think we improved this one, to be honest.
Halfwit of Kintyre
Paul McCartney’s terrible Wings single (even through Wings did some great music). Get the bagpipes out, lads! No… why the plastic bags? Oh, you halfwits!
Total Eclipse of the Halfwit
Catchy tune with a negative message for lesser intelligence. Bad song!
Boy George this time. When not busy dressing up as a man, he’s having a go at the dumb people. Do you really want to hurt them, George?
What’s Love Got To Do With Halfwits?
True, good point. Thanks Tina Turner.
Like a Halfwit
Madonna’s smash hit single. It was really controversial, because of the overly religious nature of the song given the subject matter.
Everytime You Halfwit Away
Thanks, Paul Young, you’re right on that one. They do go off on it.
There’ll be Halfwit Songs (To Make You Cry)
Well… it depends how dumb the lyrics are, we guess.
Take My Halfwit Away
Berlin’s smash hit is a positive message for stupid people. Readers in this blog should revel in the moment. You’re worth it.
Walk Like an Halfwit
The Bangles getting grammar wrong there. How does a halfwit walk? From experience, it’s a general stagger down the street whilst clattering into thing.
Halfwit is a Place on Earth
Thanks, Belinda Carlise. We guess it’s dependant on which country you live in.
The Way You Make Me Halfwit
Michael Jackson channelling the dumb. Good on you, man. We’ve been doing that for the last eight years.
Here Comes the Halfwit
The Beatles in abusive form here. Was that really necessary, John Lennon?!
I Want To Hold Your Halfwit
Not advised, that may end in bouts of extreme violence and/or gurgling.
Sympathy for the Halfwit
The Rollings Stones—thank you for that. Empathy is a good step.
Led Zeppelin hit it big with this number.
Over the Halfwit and Far Away
Led Zeppelin hit it big with this song, too! Well done.
I Got You, Halfwit
Cher song about the standardised message for this post. Now, try and get the REAL song out of your head, eh? EH!?