Saved by the Bell was a popular TV sitcom in the 1980s and 1990s. That’s why we want to reboot it as Saved by the Bull.

As we feel bulls don’t get enough primetime television spots.

We’re all about diversity! And this is the chance for us to demonstrate bulls are really, really good at saving things (and rampaging about the place with wild abandon).

Coming of Age Tales in Saved by the Bull

Set in Bayside High School in LA (like with the original show), the sitcom follows the exploits of a male bull (as opposed to a female bull) and its journey through high school.

As a horrendous, malodorous, often highly belligerent misfit, the bull (called Bull by the other kids in a remarkable moment of inventiveness) finds he is somewhat alienated from his peers.

Primarily as they’re not massive great big bulls.

And that dichotomy is the main driving (stampeding) force of the show, with Bull struggling to adapt in an education system not intended for bulls.

Naturally, we didn’t want to involve a real bull in this production.

So it was a motion capture job, with Hollywood legend Arnold Schwarzenegger providing the movements of the bull throughout the shoot. CGI then layered the bull in afterward for ultra-lifelike bull antics.

Many on set said it was remarkably moving (and hilarious) to see Schwarzenegger hurtling about making bellowing and roaring noises.

A pilot episode was shot for Saved by the Bull, costing $15 million in a lavish production befitting Schwarzenegger’s star power.

There was hope for a 10 season run (at a cost of at least $200 million).

However, critics immediately noted how “shoddy” the effects looked in the pilot. And Schwarzenegger’s bull acting was also noted as “beyond awful” and that he should “stick to terminating things” (a reference to films such as 1991’s Terminator 2).

One critic, who was later terminated in a possibly unrelated incident, noted that Schwarzenegger’s bull acting was akin to, “A goat pretending to be a great white shark.”

Sadly, due to this negative feedback, the show was cancelled at the pilot.

Schwarzenegger was furious about the decision. He quipped to the press, “It’s all bullshit!” And later added, “I’ll be back.” However, he won’t be back (and nor will the show) as the studio had the script and production sets incinerated.

Second Reboot Attempt: Saved by the Belt

In a desperate bid to reboot Saved by the Bell in some respect, the concept Saved by the Belt was suggested as an affirming show for the belts of this world.

Although it was expected studio execs would shun the idea, the concept was actually greenlit and a $50 million budget went ahead.

However, this was sadly cancelled two days into production.

It emerged the exec who signed off on Saved by the Belt was, at that time, heavily under the influence of alcohol, drugs, and energy drinks. The studio informed tabloid The Daily Disaster:

“He was so out of it he would have signed off a concept involving Monica from Friends returning for a Frasier reboot as Frasier Crane himself. Can you imagine? It would be demented!

Anyway, the executive in question has been disciplined through a complimentary pay rise on his existing six-figure salary.”

The tragedy of this is it appears Saved by the Bell fans will have no reboot. That is unless other potential reboots can resurrect the series. Such as:

• Saved by the Smell
• Saved by the Well (we forgot we did this in 2018)
• Saved by the Belle
• Saved by Shell (a propaganda vehicle for everyone’s favourite vast, unconquerable multinational oil and gas company)
• Saved by William Tell

If you’re an obscenely wealthy, insane, out of it studio exec reading this… please, fund one of these projects!