Butter wine is pure butter and 10% ethanol. Now with EXTRA BUTTER, our new and improved beverage ensures you get the dairy fix you need.

Our beautiful alcoholic beverage is superb for any social occasion and/or over a bowl of cereal at 8am because you’re a raging alcoholic with an uncontrollable lust for butter.

Order from one of our 12 nationwide stores today to ensure your desire to consume wine is completed by this largely non-wine based product.

For the Sophisticated Oenophile—Butter Wine

For the sophisticate whom understands the need to peddle the fine things in life at other people, look no further than this most glorious of creations. Featuring as its core, supremely superbly crafted ingredients:

• Butter
• Harsh chemical grade ethanol
• Tobasco sauce
• A dollop of marmalade

It is this secret formula that shall propel our product to the very forefront of the wine industry. It is already beholden unto those of celebrity, fame, and fortune—Brad Pitt himself said of this product:

“I’m Brad Pitt and I want to marry a bottle of butter wine.”

While we may have invented that quote to suit our marketing needs, we’re 100% certain Mr. Pitt won’t want to sue us because we shall send him all the free wine he wants (upon request and within reasonable limits).

The Taste Test: Buttery Hints

“Tasting this wine is like discovering a foul stain left on thine carpet. The mutt is responsible, one knows, which requires a most urgent need to acquire some bleach.” Anonymous wine critic

This is the best feedback thus far for our most esteemed product. We have embraced these fine words like a fine wine and sup at the glass while opining over the future of dairy.

Frequently Asked Questions About Butter Wine

Here are some FAQs to slake your desire for more knowledge about our award-losing product.

Is butter wine really a wine?

When bending reality to suit our profit goals? Yes. Truthfully? No.

Can you spread this product on bread?

Absolutely not! It is for oral consumption purposes only, by which we mean you imbibe the product as a true sophisticate should. Reminder, this item is not, repeat, is not for lager louts and/or riffraff.

Will my date fall in love with me if I proffer this fine wine at her during our dinner date?

Sure, why not?

I got this wine for my brother’s wedding and his missus said it was “disgusting”! What gives?

Your brother has clearly married someone morally bankrupt and lacking in decency. Suggest to him he commence divorce proceedings. Buy him another bottle of butter wine as commiserations commence.