Soap Crunching: In Praise Of Scrunching Up Cleaning Products

Soap crunching
Crunch.

In a recent post we took a peak at knifing kinetic sand. But some people just want to see soap burn (or at least get crushed into bits). So we’re here to promote the ancient (we’re guessing) practice of getting flaky soap and scrunching it up in a satisfying manner. Dealing with a lot of stress today? Well, get ready to not be (dealing with as much stress)!

Soap Crunching

In truth, we consider this practice superior to stabbing sand. Indeed. But for Instagram account owner @soapcurls_asmr, it’s more of a lifestyle choice. We guess you either want to crunch up soap for stress release purposes, or you have it in for soap. We can see why you might hate it, given that it could make your skin all clean and everything. Some people just want to wallow in filth.

But, feck, is it satisfying seeing that stupid stuff being smushed up! Just look at the above video. So we’re not sure if you have to be some sort of twisted pervert to enjoy this (as with the sand stabbing stuff). So we did some research. It turns out there’s this thing called autonomous meridian response (ASMR) – it’s a sort of tingling sensation. “Head tingles” is the layperson’s term for this and, no, that doesn’t mean getting drunk.

The Guardian (that’s a British newspaper, if you’re wondering) documented the appeal of this stuff, particularly for ASMR fans. Although those loony lefty, PC numpties begin the article with “Another day, another trend” we feel the need to point out this movement is far more than a trend. It is a lifestyle!

But, anyway, the emergence of this soap cutting trend is, in part, to cater for the ASMR community. But other NORMAL folks just find it all soothing. Hypnotic, even, which is what the above Russian lady has described it like. She points out how expensive it is in Russia to have a hobby, so citizens distract themselves. Her particular hobby costs her $100 per month in soap, which she acknowledges comes at a heavy cost.

The thing here is, anyone can have a go. It’s free to start an Instagram (all it costs is, like, $500 for a smartphone!) and it’s also free to steal soap. If you don’t want to steal it, then you’ll have to buy it. Just be sure to recycle the stuff after each soap-murdering session – mush it back together and have another go.

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