Right, Tea Week has ended! Get over it and move on with your lives. You at the back! Stop your putrid whining and rejoice, for today we’re going to go on about popcorn. Specifically, we’re going to rant about PROPERCORN and its latest flavour – Smooth Peanut and Almond.

We’ve ranted about this London based company before (please see In Praise of PROPERCORN) and today we’re going to rant about it again. Why? Those crazed maniacs were nice enough to send a massive box FOR FREE to the Professional Moron office. Oh my days, did Mr. Wapojif go bananas. It took hours to get him down off the roof – he’d gone up there to fire off rounds from his shotgun, you see. This is his “celebratory dance” as he describes it. Anyway, why was he so excited? It was simple because of…

PROPERCORN: Smooth Peanut and Almond

PROPERCORN, quite out of the blue, sent us this thing on Monday. In the past, Mr. Wapojif has ranted about his obsession with the brand (whose products he’s purchased for several years now) on social media. We guess they picked up on this wild rambling, looked us up, and sent the big box to us! It’s either this or they have an unholy prescience which mere mortals such as we can only marvel at.

Included in this box were the new range – the Smooth Peanut and Almond flavour. This has been out for a few months but has proven highly difficult to acquire. In the picture above you can make out the Smooth Peanut and Almond ones at the bottom of the box. Do you see? Even in photography form they’re hiding away from you?

Anyway, tasting these for the first time is one smooth experience. As you’d expect, there’s a distinct peanut and almond flavouring going on here, and it’s mighty smooth. Quite how PROPERCORN made it so smooth we don’t know. Perhaps they crooned smoothly to the popcorn as it was being produced whilst playing smooth jazz and a smooth singer, such as Frank Sinatra, song smooth stuff in the background. Heck, this is conjecture! PROPERCORN has trade secrets to uphold.

Anyway, if you can get a hold of a packet (if you live abroad, perhaps try ordering a batch to ship over to you – totally worth it as this stuff is the best popcorn on Earth) we’d thoroughly recommend it! It’s vegetarian and vegan friendly and you’ll be dancing a popcorn dance of joy as you stuff the stuff into your stupid face. Groovy!