Probably our favourite Big Arnie Noise (i.e. one-liner) is from The Running Man (1987). It’s part of another popular Big Arnie one-liner.

That’s right! It’s a one-liner… within a one-liner! The full quote is this:

“You cold-blooded bastard! I’ll tell you what I think of it—I’ll live to see you eat that contract, but I hope you leave enough room for my fist because I’m going to ram it into your stomach and break your goddamn spine!”

Lovely, eh? That was action movies in the ’80s for you. But it makes us think… what if Arnold had said something else?!?

You cold-blooded bastard!

Here’s the original in all its glory. Bit of selfie action from Big Arnie here. And what a delivery! Sends shivers down your spine, eh?

Misses the macho muscles of lines such as “Dillon! You son of a bitch!” but it makes up for that shortcoming with the drawn-out preposterousness of the rest of the line.

You bastard!

Just a bit more concise this one, you know? Drop the cold-blooded bit out. It’s filler. Just get straight to the point, Arnold.

Bastard!

Again, just tidying up that copy. Keeping it nice and concise. Gets the job done the same way, just a tad faster.

You cold-blooded flash flood!

Schwarzenegger is right here, those pesky flash floods are very cold-blooded. Totally out of context for a film such as Running Man, but at least Arnold has his mind set on environmental dilemmas.

You cold-blooded dashboard!

Not many dashboards in Running Man, nor are there many cold-blooded ones in the real world. Still, we like the line. So, it stays.

You cold-blooded mustard!

Mustard in the world of Big Arnie. We presume this line comes from Running Man’s wardrobe. He’s in a bright yellow leotard for much of the film. Standard.

You cold-spudded bastard!

Arnold getting a bit of a dig in here on potatoes. What’s he got against spuds!? The Running Man is missing his mashed potato, clearly.

You fuddy-duddy!

This would be for the PG version. Good fun, family-friendly entertainment is The Running Man. As long as you remove all the dystopian death, destruction, and murder, that is.

You bloody bastard!

This is the British version, with Big Arnie affecting a superb RP English tone for most of the film. Which would totally be worth watching.

Queue, cold blooded bastard!

More British leaning stuff here with the need to queue properly. Good on you, Arnold, for upholding stiff upper lip honour!

Moo! Cold-blooded bastard!

If there’s one thing seriously missing from The Running Man, it’s Arnold Schwarzenegger doing impressions of moo cows.

You French marigold-blooded bastard!

This is just Arnold losing his mind a little bit at this point. Stress will do that to you.

Or… again, Arnold is cleverly hinting at the yellow of the French marigold in relation to his yellow leotard. What do you think? We think… leotard!

You remote-controlled bastard!

Erm… yeah, maybe Big Arnie is losing his mind a little bit at this point. Perhaps he’s just missing his days of driving remote controlled cars.

You old-blooded bastard!

Bit of ageism here from Big Arnie, the Running Man. Boo! Hiss! Stick with the “cold” line, it’s more befitting of the situation.

And finally…

You cold-blooded bar steward!

Big Arnie is fantasising about being in a bar. What would he drink? We should imagine he’s a dandelion and burdock kind of man.

That’s just a wild guess. There’s no supporting empirical evidence to back up such a claim. But sometimes all you need is instinct.