Singing Lessons With Sam the Sheep 🐑 [Sponsored Post]

Singing lessons with Sam the sheep

Baa baa black sheep, have you any wool? Do you want to master pelting out that little number of karaoke night!? Well, then YOU need singing lessons with Sam the sheep!

Sam is a sheep with five years’ experience of being a sheep.

She’s an ewe with an ear for fine vocal performances and can pelt out numbers such as Bohemian Rhapsody and Stayin’ Alive without breaking into a canter! So, learn from the defining master of her generation NOW!

Sam the Sheep’s Vocal Lessons are Superb!

Sam the sheep can help you with beginner and professional singing lessons. Including for skills such as:

Vocal exercises
Scales
Repertoire
Theory
Biology
Rehearsals
Performance
Chewing grass mindlessly in a big field

Sam the sheep has performed in front of audiences as big as up to 12 people! Her baaing in fields has drawn people from as far away as Scunthorpe to see her singing in her native field of Thame, Oxfordshire.

With that experience under her belt, you’ll welcome to book sessions and stand in a big old field with Sam while baaing your heart out.

Sam will be able to teach you songs such as:

Baa, Baa, Black Sheep
Sheep (the Pink Floyd track)
And Dream of Sheep (Kate Bush)
Pigs, Sheep, and Wolves (Paul Simon)
Sheep (The Housemartins)
Sheep Go to Heaven (Cake)
I Just Wanna Be a Sheep (Studio Musicians
Sheep May Safely Graze (Nick Cave)
Black Sheep (Martin Sexton)

Of course, Sam also sings non-sheep based hits as she’s not a staggering philistine interested only in her own kind.

Ask her nicely and she’ll help you through operas from the likes of Wagner and she also has a solid understanding of gangster rap.

The Structure of Sam the Sheep’s Singing Lessons

Upon arrival, customers are advised to approach Sam carefully. If you come at speed she’ll simply scarper as a self-preservation tactic.

Once Sam has accepted your presence, she’ll make a few welcoming bleats and then expect you to begin singing. What happens next is:

As you sing, if Sam gets pissed off with your performance she’ll ram you up the arse.
If she enjoys your performance, she’ll bleat merrily.

Those are the only outcomes of this situation. Please note, if you are rammed and seek to press legal charges you’re wasting your time.

Sam is a sheep and, therefore, unsueable.

Freebie: Sam’s Baa, Baa, Black Sheep Masterclass

Baa baa black sheep, have you any wool?
Yes sir, yes sir, three bags full,
One for the master, one for the dame,
And one for the little boy who lives down the lane.

Sam the Sheep is the world’s leading expert on this nursery rhyme, which was first published in 1744.

The pelting track features addictive lyrical loops, a complex narrative, and open-ended finale that grips listeners with its intensity and takes them on an emotional rollercoaster. Most people are blubbing uncontrollably by the song’s close, which can be exacerbated if Sam decides to ram them in the backside with her blunt skull.

But her knowledge of the song’s single stanza, told in trochaic metre, is remarkable. She’s been on record to consider the rhyme the greatest song ever written. Yes, better even than Twinkle Twinkle Little Star!

A meeting with Sam and she’ll dispense some of her profound knowledge of this iconic nursery rhyme. So much so you’ll come away from your vocal session: