Are YOU sick and tired of having to put EFFORT into dating!? Do YOU think a handful of half-arsed acronyms should be enough to land you a date with a babe?!

Then sign on up TODAY to HRU.

It’s the dating app for lazy toxic bastards who don’t want to go beyond typing more than a handful of words per message, while expecting dames to fling themselves at your charismatic Adonis nature.

💝 Discover TRUE LOVE Through Limited Effort On HRU 💖

At HRU, dating laziness is positively CELEBRATED. Here you can indulge in all the worst small talk online dating disasters, including the notorious openers:

• Hi
• Hi how are you
• hru
• wot u up to
• WUU2
• we’re u from
• wot u looking 4 on hear
• wots you’re snapchat
• give me ur no babe

On 99% of all other apps, this sort of boring behaviour is GUARANTEED to ruin your dating prospects.

NOT ON HRU!!!

That’s because we’ve paid a bunch of women to pretend to be interested in you, while also using 1,000s of AI bots to send out fake messages and likes to delude you into thinking you’re the next Brad Pitt in waiting.

In fact, you’re actively BLOCKED from typing messages with more than three words. To add to that, words with two syllables are strictly limited! No more than two a day!

This is because, famously, women (dames) love a man with a limited vocabulary and sense of domineering entitlement. That’s what HRU succeeds at a BILLION times over:

1. Not of that stupid woke stuff.
2. None of that pretending to have feminist values.
3. None of that spending a few days trying to chat her up with long, long sentences of up to 10 words a go.

Just straight to the point! HRU because you don’t want a penpal, love, you just expect her to drop everything at the mere demonstration of your staggering laziness.

😘 Customer Testimonials: HRU is a Matchmaking PARADISE 😍

Don’t just take our word for it! Our star-crossed lovers have been many and varied—read the beautiful stories below of how our customers found TRUE LOVE on HRU.

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“Paid the £50 subscription and was immediately swimming in birds! Rolled out all me best lines from there with hru, wuu2, we’re u from, u got snap and before I new it me had 10 dates. They all stood me fucking up and that but didn’t matter i refined me game and just stuck to hru and nowt else and got another 20 dates. Them all stood me up to. Not happy. £50 for this? Waist of my time! Bastards would give 0/5 if I bloody well could!” Dave from Bolton of Greater Manchester

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“DO NOT WAIST YOU’RE TIME THIS IS SCAM APP! WOULD GIVE 0/5 IF I COULD NOT WORTH PAYING FOR BUT I PAID FOR IT TWICE AND WE’RE ON FORE SIX MONTHS GOT ONE DATE AND IT ENDED UP BEING A MAN WTF THESE SCAMMERS SHOULD BE IN JAIL AND THEN PRISON.” Bob from Burnley

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“Scammers. SCAMMERS! Scammers and FAKES all over this SO CALLED ‘app’. I’d give -10 out of 5 if I bloody well could me this is a bastarding DISGRACE. Got one date, turned out to be a woman 20 year older than she said and know where MARRIED. This app made me do that. Not happy. Miserable, me.” Kev from Chorley

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“dont fall for it fellas i paid for me subscription and even sent £5k to a stunning model who said she needed it to come to uk to marry me but then i never herd from her again this is a scam and a wrong un. or maybe its cos i told her iv got piles. i knead two stop mentioning that to women i now its a not attractive thing DAMMIT greg wot u playin at man?! 50 and know got it together bastard lefties” Greg from Rochdale