1970, eh? We weren’t around at the time, but the film Love Story sure was. It churned up one of the most nauseatingly bad romantic drama lines in history.

Love means never having to say you’re sorry… is problematic. Like, if you burn your partner’s shed down in a drunken rage you don’t have to apologise? We think you should have to apologise (and buy a new shed).

Anyway, this film starred Ali MacGraw and Ryan O’Neal and the line is in it and MacGraw had to say it. Poor her.

Love means never having to say you’re sorry

Here’s the original in all its glory. This one is bad, man. Bad! Almost as bad as “Is it still raining? I hadn’t noticed.” from Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994). Just to be clear—people in love say sorry all the time. It’s natural. Step on your partner’s foot? You apologise. Steal their wallet? You don’t tell them and keep it a dark secret. Ad infinitum.

Love means never having to say your sorry

Just getting the grammatically incorrect version out of the way.

Love means never having to say you’re Barry

Who is Barry? This is odd as she’s claiming you don’t have to say “sorry” ever if you’re a Barry in love. Very problematic. Very problematic indeed.

Love means never having to say you’re on a safari

We guess. You’d probably still have to tell your parents, though. “Hi mom, I’m on a safari with Ryan O’Neal!” And she’d be all like, “OMG! The movie star?! OMG!” And all would be well.

Love means never having to say you’re into dairy

This is a modern take, a non-vegan lying to his/her vegan partner. Gosh, the ramifications would be truly appalling. Off the scale.

Love means never having to souffle you’re sorry

Baking a souffle to say you’re sorry is a real red flag move or lying. Never trust the souffle.

Love means never having to say you’re curry

This one doesn’t make sense, but we like curry so we’re running with it.

Love means never having to say you’re scary

Well, true. You don’t have to say you’re scary. But if you are scary then that’ll be obvious. Depends what type of scary, too, like if you’re on an Annie Wilkes in Misery (1990) film type scary than that’s very bad indeed.

Love means never saying sorry

Just as a nod to filler words, this whole thing could have been truncated very easily. It would have spared poor Ali MacGraw a bit of embarrassment, too. From eight words to five—a lifetime, in the world of cinema.

Love means never shaving to say you’re sorry

Never shaving, you say? So… you’re okay with Ryan O’Neals hairy back, man beard, hairy knuckles, and nose hair? Well, fair play to Mz. MacGraw as she’s not the fussy type.

And finally…

Love means forever having to say you’re sorry

We feel this is an accurate way to wrap things up. Everything screws up. Maybe you set fire to the family home or accidentally blew up your husband’s man cave. Either way, you’ll be apologising a lot and that’s good and healthy, bro.