It’s the Pot Noodle Sandwich!

Pot Noodle sandwich
The Pot Noodle sandwich. My word.

A Pot Noodle sandwich? Yes! We like to experience cultural refinery at the Professional Moron office, and nothing speaks class like a bespoke sandwich with a noodle filling.

Our esteemed editor, Mr. Wapojif, dreamt up this concept in early 2012, but only now it has finally reached fruition. Today is a glorious day for instant noodles!

As a result, it takes the noodle experience to a splendiferous new level. For this, we can only thank Mr. Wapojif’s absurd brain, which had the tenacity to conceive this idiotic recipe and bow before him at the altar of ridiculousness.

The Ingredients You Need For a Pot Noodle Sandwich

Pot Noodle ingredients
What you’ll need.

You won’t need much for this—sandwiches aren’t overly complicated, you know. If you’re a bit stupid, though, here’s the list of requirements:

  • 1 Pot Noodle
  • 1 ciabatta (or other type of bread)
  • 1 plate

You’ll also need a kettle, unless you want the noodles raw on your bread. That’d be gross, so perhaps skip on that a bit.

How to Make Your Pot Noodle Sandwich

To prepare the sandwich one needs to follow a strenuous set of instructions. This goes as follows:

  1. Boil the kettle with the right amount of water
  2. Add the boiled water to the Pot Noodle
  3. Toast the bread (if you want to, that is)
  4. Once the noodles are brewed, add to the bread!

You may want to leave the noodles on the bread for a bit so it truly soaks up the noodle-based nutrients and overall goodness.

Whatever you decide, once the Pot Noodle has brewed simply slop it over the bread. Et voilà! You have made a Pot Noodle sandwich. Congratulations!

Pot Noodles
It’s a wonderful sight, you have to admit.

The result, you’ll agree, is quite spectacular. On a culinary level the merger of noodles and bread has long been overdue.

It’s kind of like Arnold Schwarzenegger and noodles. It may seem like a weird combination, but it can work a treat.

It provides a carbohydrate hit which will leave you feeling bloated, unsettled, and wholly uncomfortable. But full, too, and being full is what it’s all about!

Noodles Sandwich
Please note, after consuming this you will feel: lethargic, irritable, and bloated.

In total, this meal costs about £2 ($4), so it’s absolutely ideal for students and working class reprobates.

If you’re in a total pig-out mood, however, it’s the ideal recipe to make you feel miserable about yourself after consumption.

Truly, the Pot Noodle sandwich is a modern marvel.


  1. Congratulations! I totally love this European take on the Pot Noodle Sandwich.
    The regular N. American Wonder Bread Pot Noodle Sandwich would never hold up dirth wise.
    Only a ciabatta has the strength to hold up to Pot Noodles.
    Bespoke? Absolutely, & nothing less!

    Liked by 1 person

Dispense with some gibberish!

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