Ibex Insurance Ltd. is the GOAT [Sponsored Post]

Ibex Insurance Ltd.

If you want to visit an insurance firm (and NOT Egor’s equity release firm), but HATE dealing with human beings, then Ibex Insurance Ltd. is the service for you!

It’s the ONLY insurance firm in the WORLD run by wild goats.

The team of highly qualified ibex insurers will help you with any of your claims, whether it’s for life insurance, wild goat insurance, or if you’re planning to blow up your business in an insurance scam kind of way.

Our ibexes don’t bleat on about it! We’re just here to maa (and chew on your trouser legs when you’re not looking).

Ibex Insurance is the GOAT (greatest of all time)

Drop into our office in Manchester city centre! You’ll be greeted at the door by our friendly receptionist Irene the Ibex.

She’s a lovely wild goat and, if you’re lucky, she won’t charge you and ram her massive antlers into your nether regions. And if you survive that ordeal, this is the type of insurance we’ll sort you out with:

  • Life
  • Vehicle
  • Business
  • Courier
  • Sole trader
  • Savings and investments
  • Carrots and other munchables
  • Trousers

In between expert information about insurance policies, our ibex team will bleat in high-pitched fashion and munch on your tasty trousers.

Please wear really nice trousers when you arrive, because our ibex team just loves trouser munching. We apologise for munching on your trousers, but they look so very, very tasty and we can’t help but try to consume the whole lot of them insatiably.

In return, you’ll receive top notch insurance information and providers.

You just will lose your trousers. We offer total transparency like that in bleating fashion—no more trousers for you! But you get excellent value life insurance in an EXCELLENT trade-off.

Ibex Insurance Ltd.’s Favourite Types of Human Legwear

Sorry to stress the point, humans, but please turn up in the following types of legwear (for the aforementioned lunchability purposes):

  • Trousers (or pants)
  • Skinny jeans
  • Skirts
  • Sheer tights
  • Stockings
  • Man shorts
  • Shorts
  • Over-the-knee socks
  • Yoga pants

There are 10 ibex employees here at Ibex Insurance Ltd. and that’s a lot of mouths to feed. Bring with you tasty vegetables, of course, but also trousers and other legwear.

We offer you discount prices on trousers insurance, too, so you don’t have to worry about excess trouser costs whenever you visit our store.

Because we will be eating your trousers every time you turn up.

Get a 20% discount on your legwear from Primark when you do a 10 year insurance deal with us, ensuring you get fresh pants every time you visit us and we munch on them.

Even if you manage to escape our office (and we will chase you down the road if you flee) with your trousers intact, you’ll have goat slobber all over them. And who wants that? Better stay put and let us munch on trousers between bouts of insurance advice.

Frequently Asked Questions

You have questions about out goat-based insurance policies for you humans? Here are some trouser-based fast facts!

Can’t I just conduct business with you guys over the phone?

NO! YOU VISIT STORE! And you wear trousers. Nice trousers and we will munch on them over and over.

How do I cancel my insurance policy with you?

You bring us many trousers to munch on, then we may cancel if we feel satisfied.

What in the name of Christ is with all the trouser munching!? I had a panic attack last time I visited!

That is why you need life insurance with us and health insurance! Visit again soon to get policies (and don’t forget to wear nice trousers).


Dispense with some gibberish!

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