The Manchester Duck Race: All Hail Charity Fun With Ducks!

Manchester duck race
It’s a duck!

It’s the seventh annual Manchester Duck Race on the 25th March. This isn’t some insane tradition for no real reason held by eccentric Brits.

No, this is for the children’s charity Brainwave. “Marvellous”, you chirrup, “but how does this help the world?” Well, it’s a charity event stupid. It raises money to further a good cause. Duh!

Last year, Professional Moron entered (through our real day job) and designed a fabulous Golden Mother Duck and her ducklings.

The little ducks were in the guise of the likes of Where’s Wally?, Shy Guy from Nintendo games, Robber Duck (a duck dressed as a robber), and several superhero sort of things.

We lost the race, but we raised £300 for charity and this is all that matters. ‘twas a fun event as well, so if you’re in Manchester (or want to chip in some money to Brainwave) and want to see a fun event you’d better hasten on down.

The Manchester Duck Race

Manchester duck race corporate duck
Oooo! The colours!

This was our entry last year. Good, huh? Anyway, there was an award for the best design but this was won by some super rich company which totally didn’t deserve it because they cheated through greater creative skill. We also lost in the actual race down the River Irwell. Which was a bummer.

Anyway, the idea for businesses is to buy a corporate duck (£270), doll the thing up, and enter it into the race and the “fashion” contest.

It’s a great deal of social media exposure whatever way you look at it, and it raises money for little ones whom are also known as “children”.

As good causes go, it’s good. It also involves rubber ducks, which is pretty awesome. Rubber ducks make the world go round, although we still prefer the live ones as they’re capable of the truly inspiring catchphrase: “quack”.

However, you can’t take them into a bathtub with you. Unless you want some serious wounds inflicted on your nether regions.

Join the Event!

The Manchester Duck Race event
Rubber ducks! Mr. Wapojif’s viewpoint in April 2015.

You’re totally stoked for this now, so you can attend the event at the extremely fancy Spinningfields down in the bottom bit of Manchester city centre.

You can enter on a duck-by-duck basis for £1 a duck. Alternatively, if you’re a rich business tycoon, you can purchase a corporate duck for £270.

You can buy the ducks from Spinningfields. Get to it, wherever you are! That’s not an order, it’s a suggestion you’re welcome to adhere to or entirely ignore.

Either way we’re probably going to be there, so if you want to see some local celebrities you’d better hike on down and join Mr. Wapojif as he loiters on corners and acts all shifty.


  1. Wish we had one here in Canada. I would suggest Niagra Falls as the launching point. Well, eventually we will catch up with the rest of the civilized world. It’s hard not to notice Mr. Wapojif has a rather … yellowy complexion. Any relation?
    One day I will be honored to design an Art Gown out of rubber ducks!

    Liked by 1 person

    • As it turns out we are entering it this year. In a mad panic, I’ve got seven days to think of a design. I thought the Donald Trump Duck… or Robber Duck. The latter would be easy to design – lots of white and black in trademark robber style guise. Wicked!


      • OMG! I will totally root for your duck! If it’s the Trump Duck, glue a comb over hairpiece on it! “GO Professional Moron Duck!!!!!” Wicked is the word.. for sure!

        Liked by 1 person

        • Okay, now we’re not sure if we are entering it. Take a brain check on this one until we have the DEFINITIVE yay or nay. Regardless, we’ll be going to event on 25th March. JOIN US! MWahahaha!


Dispense with some gibberish!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.