Star Trek: “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few” Quote Off Extravaganza!

After our look at “To boldly go where no man has gone before” moment, we’re now looking at the Wrath of Khan (1982) film quote, “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.”

Courtesy of Spock (Leonard Nimoy). That’s right, we’ve GONE SOCIALIST on the blog today OMG we can’t even…

Anyway, let’s take a look at what should have happened with righteous, pure, and agreeable CAPITALIST sentiments applied to that most famous of lines.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few

Here’s the original SOCIALIST version and we can barely even make it past the 10 seconds mark without simultaneously quaking in terror, whilst being outraged by the OPPRESSION of our FREEDOM.

If you’re poor you should work harder

Let’s just balance that out right away with the righteous, pure, agreeable, sound, and excellent capitalist freedom and brilliance applied to the quote.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of a shrew

Yeah you can’t ignore Spock’s logic on this one. Shrews, whether communistic ones or righteous and pure capitalists, are kind of irrelevant in this debate.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of achoo

Even Spock was prone to sneezing, from time to time.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of a shoe

Indeed. The day shoes become more important than people is the day Hell freezes over.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of The Who

Well, maybe. We love The Who, so we’d say we’ll focus in on them for a change instead of the needs of the many. Thank you very much!

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the stew

It depends how good the stew is. Like, if it’s a Lancashire hotpot then we’re really going to prioritise that over the needs of the many. Sorry, but slaking our hunger comes first.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the loo

Again, it really depends how badly you need to go to the loo. If it’s an emergency situation then, no choice, you’re going. When you gotta go you gotta go (as Dr. Ian Malcolm said in Jurassic Park).

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the corkscrew

Well, not really. Like, if you really, really want to drink that bottle of fancy wine then the needs of the many can wait until you’re wasted, surely?

The needs of the many crochet the needs of the few

Er… this philosophical statement has no time for crochet. Next.

The weeds of the many outweigh the weeds of the few

Yes, even in deep space weeds are a problem. Best to take measures to ensure your gardens are growing properly, such as through using Spock’s indifferent stares to facilitate daffodil growth.

The beads of the many outweigh the beads of the few

Beads? We do think the Star Trek crew would have benefitted from fully beaded hair. That would have been something to behold.

The beads of the many outweigh the beads of kung fu

Indeed. There’s a time and a place for kung fu and it’s probably not the time and place for it in space. Not with all that physics stuff flying around.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of Lulu

Agreed. Lulu may be a fine singer, but we don’t see why she should get prim and proper treatment over the many. This may seem harsh, but it’s the truth.