Miracles Happen: It’s The Choc Noodle!

Choc Noodle
It’s the Choc Noodle!

The Choc Noodle? A chocolate Pot Noodle? Yes, sometimes something incredible happens in this massive old world which means we don’t have to think of anything to write about. Today is one of those days. Huzzah!

Indeed, Pot Noodle inventors Pot Noodle have announced a variation on their noodle based snack thing. As they’ve explained on their site, the Choc Noodle isn’t available in shops yet but, heck, at least we can all stare at it a bit.

A Choc Noodle… what?

Let’s reiterate: it’s a Pot Noodle with chocolate in it. Innit. Seriously, it has fudge chunks and chocolate drops in there, along with your standard noodles, chocolate covered pecan nuts, and more noodles. It’s a Pot Noodle dessert, effectively, meaning one can now eat a Pot Noodle (such as the legendary Chicken and Mushroom flavour), then finish off your evening meal with a Choc Noodle.

All you have to do is add boiling water, and both are ready after four minutes, respectively, of “cooking” time. Using our powers of deduction, Professional Moron can reveal this equates to but a mere 8 minutes of cooking time to foist upon yourself your evening meal. Not quite as fast as beans on toast, but a heck of a lot better than a full Sunday Roast!

Pot Noodle a few years ago, ironically, did do a Christmas Dinner Pot Noodle for soldiers serving in some pointless war somewhere. There was also the Kebab Pot Noodle, for those too drunk to be bothered to order a kebab after a night out. Mind you, an inebriated person could easily pour scolding hot boiled water over their arm in mistake of a Pot Noodle.

A Chocolatey Conclusion

So be careful, people. What we’re really surprised about is how there’s no Full English Breakfast Pot Noodle. Surely with the myriad of chemicals companies can come up with these days, flavourings could be added to make this happen. Or how about a Cornflakes Pot Noodle? Or a Haggis Pot Noodle? Apparently it’s Chocolate Week, or something, which explains the Choc Noodle, but Professional Moron demands a Kipper Pot Noodle or we won’t be buying the Choc Noodle. Calling us pedantic? Don’t even go there, sister!

5 comments

  1. Stomach is quite, quite, quite….ad infinitum …. upset over Haggis Pot Noodle. Although, being open minded perhaps it could be a thing for Robert Burns birthday, which I never attend.

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    • Sadly the Choc Noodle was on a trial run and hasn’t hit the shops yet. I put “sadly” as I wanted to do a taste test blog post. Ho hum.

      Still no news on a Haggis Pot Noodle (we did find out recently haggis is banned in America, for some reason), but you will be interested to learn there was a Christmas Dinner Pot Noodle three years ago, and it was repeated in 2013 as the Pot Noeldle. I’m starting to get worried about my Pot Noodle knowledge.

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      • Don’t worry! Knowledge is never wasted. At least this is what I’ve heard. Also, if there is ever a Pot Noodle symposium, you could be keynote speaker. As keynote speakers get paid, I would charge through the noeldle!

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        • Knowledge is power! I’m adding that to my CV: “Pot Noodle Expert”. Who wouldn’t want to know about dehydrated noodles, vegetables, and flavoured powder? A true ice breaker for any social enterprise.

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