Women (also known as “human females”, “ladies”, and “oi oi, darlin’!”) populate the working environment of modern life due to THE WOKE MOB.

The sad reality of liberal scum ideologies is women have been granted the right to work at work. Vastly superior men, such as Dave from accounts with his balding cranium and massive hairy beer gut, now have to tolerate “the woman”.

This employment law guide covers how to handle this global pandemic. From how to set women tasks without them shrieking hysterically, to training male employees to not tolerate the constant, incessant, relentless, unrelenting nagging about high heels.

Employment Laws and The Woman

Women at work are regulated by the legislation that is The Women (Human Females) at Work Act 1974. This is complemented by The Germaine Greer at Work Act 1974 and The Burning Bras at Work Act 1974.

A bunch of easily outraged, snowflake, right-wing males countered the, aforementioned, Acts with The Women at Work Act 1974 in an attempt to control women at work. Via an Act.

In section 37 (f—for female) on page 456,001 in Volume III of IV, The Women at Work Act 1974 states:

“While beholding The Woman At Work may be enough to make the most manly male foul his or herself in horror, communism has ensured it is an increasing inevitability.

Now, one may stroll down the street and see The Woman in jobs such as:

• Shop assistant
• Retail assistant
• Cabbage patch monitor
• Aid to incredibly important men
• Object of leering fantasy

The assault on Meninism is truly appalling and The Women at Work Act 1974 has, lo, been, thus, scriptured to encapsulate the mendacious antics of feminism in an era when men are COMING HOME FROM WORK AND HAVING TO COOK THEIR OWN DINNERS.”

In 1974, the number of men coming home from work and having to cook their own dinners rose by a startling 34%.

Global economies are still yet to recover (and may never, fully, recover), which is why we have so many recessions TO THIS DAY (that have nothing to do with the evident shitness of capitalism that keeps crashing the global economy every 5/6/7 years or so).

It is said the human male, stranded as he is, alone, scared, and frightened, will resort to binge eating Pot Noodle sandwiches until death do him part.

This is what feminism has done to the world. It is abhorrent.

Should Your Business Hire a Woman?

It’s the most pressing question of our time—are businesses capable of housing women? Some would argue the mere presence of a woman could result in bankruptcy.

There’s a famous, and notorious, case of Dave’s Diner in 1975.

Dave’s Diner, located in Bolton of Greater Manchester, was run by an all-male staff and sold nothing but pies. However, due to an economic crisis caused by feminism and socialism (but definitely not due to the 1973-1975 capitalistic recession), the diner had to hire human females to pay waiting staff below minimum wage.

Famously, and notoriously, Dave’s Diner’s customers rebelled. Interviewed in August 1975 near to Bolton bus station, a certain Mr. Smith (72) said:

“I don’t need no bloody ruddy woman serving me bloody pie in a bloody SHOP for bloody MEN! If I wanted to look at a woman, me, I’d go to ruddy bloody PORN SHOP. Not that I would do that, me, ‘cos I’m married to me wife of fifty year and I bloody ruddy hate the bloody sight of the mad wench. That’s why I’m eating meself to death with pies, mate, me!”

Mr. Smith died a year later due to exorbitant pie infestation, thusly highlighting the horrors of The Woman and any working environment.

Plus, pies.

How to Stop Women From Yakking After You Hire Them

Due to the abundance of The Woman in modern life, you’ll need to hire one or two (from time to time) in your business.

Naturally, your main concern upon this development will regard yakking.

Woman (“human females”) are legendary for yakking. When a male talks, this is deadly serious and important. Whether it be about cheese, daffodils, or punching someone in the face, it’s all-important and crucial to the future of mankind.

When a The Woman talks, it’s almost always about baffling bollocks such as:

• Cushions
• Flowers
• Bed frames
• Low fat foods
• Dainty skirts
• Embezzlement

It goes without question you should question women on their first day at work. Monitor them with CCTV as they introduce themselves to your workforce.

Pay close attention to whether they discuss cushions at length.

Cushions are not a viable means to enhancing your profit margins, thusly facilitating your desire to purchase a £40 million superyacht.

That is, unless, you run a cushion business.

And if you do, what’s wrong with you? Are you gay, or something!? Men are supposed to run businesses with billion dollar worth. Such as finances. Intensely boring, you know? But it’s the type of thing that’ll earn you a supercar or two to pull the babes.

Babes at Work

If you have any concerns regarding babes in the workplace, please refer to the 1995 film Babe and pay close attention to its plot developments and themes.

Dress Code for Human Females at Work

Finally, as we’re getting bored of writing about this, we have a guide to what human females should wear at work so as not to distract their male counterparts.

Our suggestions for this are:

• Full hazmat suits
• Kilts
• Cosplay
• Furry fandom

Although you may baulk at THE WOKE MOB ruining your business with cosplay, rest assured a human female dressed as Han Solo from Star Trek will suitably mask her identity.

Thus, you may hire The Woman on the basis she’s hidden from view and appears as macho as a bulging bicep.