The Margarine Juice Company is delighted to announce the latest in our range of margarine juices. Margarine juice now with EXTRA butter! 🧈

🧈 Bringing Melted Dairy Products to Your Nearest Dodgy Off Licence 🧈

The dairy produce is melted at our specialist dairy melting factory in Denmark, before being transported via private jet 790 miles to our Putney, London headquarters where we personally inspect the vat of melted substance before spooning it into giant metal containers.

The containers are then shipped 7,835 miles to China where our plastic bottle suppliers pay well below minimum wage to thousands of employees whom spoon feed the melted margarine/butter into the plastic bottles.

These bottles are then flown 7,835 miles back to London before being distributed across the UK.

Sustainability is our middle name. We provide the FINEST butter/margarine juice on the market and our 2025 growth has seen us invest in environmentally friendly company policies such as a 24/7 AI chatbot.

Margarine Juice (With Melted Butter🧈)

Margarine juice stormed the UK drinks market in Q1 2025 with its edgy mix of wackaging (“BUY OR DIE!”) and tasty, tasty melted margarine.

For Q4 2025, we’ve branched out to incorporate butter to introduce our second product to market. The margarine/butter combo provides consumers with a:

• Thirst quenching delight of a dairy double combo
• Hearty dose of extremely unhealthy saturated fat

Buy or die! That’s the threat we level at consumers. To make this highly enticing deal even more enticing, we have very attractive models in adverts on social media seen drinking the drink and most of them are professional enough to not barf it all up afterwards.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Melted Margarine and Butter Juice

Here are some FAQs, with answers, to our various queries from excited beverage enthusiast customers.

I tried your margarine/butter juice and it clogged my legs up one real nasty like and I can’t even move I think I’m having a brain haemorrhage. What do I do?

Rest assured, this is perfectly normal! Most of our customers experience some form of severe physical and mental reaction after consuming the juice, so there’s nothing to be alarmed about.

Can I keep the drink in the fridge?

Yes, you can keep the drink in the fridge you stupid dunce.

What if I mix the margarine/butter juice in with an energy drink, will that what is make a tasty meal innit?

You can try that if you so wish, but death is an extreme probability if you do so.

How is this drink even legal?

Thanks to the glorious nature of capitalism! As long as we make a profit, your health doesn’t matter to anyone!