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Author: Mr. Wapojif

The ESTEEMED editor of Professional Moron who rules with an iron fist. A blogger, satirist, and writer. Fond of absurdity, culture, cats, hamsters, and tea. 🍵🐈‍⬛🐹🕹️📚📽️
Star Wars The Empire Strikes Back - Why you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy looking, Nerf herder
August 22, 2017July 31, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Star Wars: “Why you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herder!” Quote Off Extravaganza!

Fromaige Fred
August 21, 2017August 16, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Breaking News: Fromage Frais to be Renamed Fromage Fred

Hyper Light Drifter in game graphics
August 20, 2017April 18, 2022 Mr. Wapojif

Hyper Light Drifter: Brooding Action-Adventure Excellence

Slime Rancher
August 20, 2017March 8, 2020 Mr. Wapojif

Slime Rancher: Farm Slimes & Frolic With Joy!

Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
August 19, 2017January 23, 2019 Mr. Wapojif

Brave New World by Aldous Huxley

August 18, 2017November 7, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Invention: The Shower Hair Dryer (shower & hair dryer all-in-one!)

Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Knightmares
August 17, 2017August 18, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

TV Shows That Never Were: Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Knightmares

How to ask out a woman
August 16, 2017August 12, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

How to Ask Out a Woman (and score every time, player!)

The history of the dunce cap
August 15, 2017January 20, 2020 Mr. Wapojif

A Brief History of the Dunce Cap

Gross numbers are gross
August 14, 2017August 13, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Gross Numbers: Why They’re the Most Disgusting on Earth

Cat Quest
August 13, 2017April 10, 2020 Mr. Wapojif

Cat Quest: Purrfect Puns in a Daft, Silly, & Cute RPG with Cats

Anthem by Ayn Rand
August 12, 2017January 28, 2019 Mr. Wapojif

Anthem by Ayn Rand

Sauceages are better than sausages
August 11, 2017August 10, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Sauceages (like sausages, but saucier)

The Tooth Pickaxe
August 10, 2017November 7, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Tooth Pickaxe (Hygienic & Dangerous!)

How to avoid being friend zoned
August 9, 2017August 4, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Agony Aunt: “HELP! How do I stop being friend zoned?”

Baguettes food and a plastic bin bag
August 8, 2017August 2, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: BAGuettes (baguettes made out of plastic bags)

Pavements and sidewalks - the difference
August 7, 2017August 9, 2022 Mr. Wapojif

News: Carnage as Pavements Renamed “Sidewalks” in the UK

Mark of the Ninja
August 6, 2017March 8, 2020 Mr. Wapojif

Mark of the Ninja: Kickass Indie Action on Steam

Being and Nothingness by Jean-Paul Sartre
August 5, 2017January 2, 2022 Mr. Wapojif

Being and Nothingness by Jean-Paul Sartre

Ditch that zero and find yourself a hero - like Superman
August 4, 2017August 4, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Agony Aunt: “How do I ditch this zero and find myself a hero?!”

Famous celebrities with different surnames
August 3, 2017August 3, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

20 A List Celebrities Renamed With Better Surnames

It's not rocket science
August 2, 2017November 3, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Great Sayings Revisited: It’s Snot Rocket Science

Breaking Bad - I am the one who knocks
August 1, 2017July 27, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Breaking Bad: “I am the one who knocks!” Quote Off Extravaganza!

Toaster and kettle all-in-one
July 31, 2017November 7, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Invention: The Tettle (a toaster and kettle all-in-one!)

Can - Ege Bamyasi
July 30, 2017July 3, 2022 Mr. Wapojif

Ege Bamyasi: Can’s Psychedelic, Funky Masterpiece

Mrs. Caliban by Rachel Ingalls
July 29, 2017January 22, 2019 Mr. Wapojif

Mrs Caliban by Rachel Ingalls

Key lime pie - now with added keys!
July 28, 2017July 27, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Key Lime Pie – Now With Extra Keys!

The Handwash Toilet
July 27, 2017November 7, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Invention: The Handwash Toilet (for cleanliness & convenience)

Pandiculation is when you yawn and stretch simultaneously
July 26, 2017April 11, 2020 Mr. Wapojif

Pandiculation: The Name For When You Yawn and Stretch

Jack of all trades (and master of nuns)
July 25, 2017November 3, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Great Sayings Revisited: Jack of all trays (and master of nuns)

Legal terms improved by using poo in the title
July 24, 2017July 22, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

20 Legal Terms Improved By Adding “Poo” Into Them

Tago Mago - Can
July 23, 2017July 16, 2022 Mr. Wapojif

Tago Mago: Can’s Explosive, Thunderous, Pulsating Masterpiece

Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
July 22, 2017January 22, 2019 Mr. Wapojif

Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad

How to go bald gracefully
July 21, 2017April 21, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

How to Go Bald Gracefully (a manly man’s guide)

Grease on Toast
July 20, 2017July 20, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Exclusive Recipe: Grease on Toast (better than cheese on toast)

Reni - Drummer extraordinaire, genius, and singer
July 19, 2017August 23, 2025 Mr. Wapojif

Reni: Drumming Genius, Singing, & Forever Cool Bucket Hats

Trainspitting
July 18, 2017July 18, 2017 Mr. Wapojif

Great Films That Never Were: Trainspitting (trains, spit, no drugs)

Mouthmosh - It does a better job than mouthwash
July 17, 2017November 7, 2021 Mr. Wapojif

Invention: MouthMosh (for rocking out with the benefit of fresh breath)

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